What Lies Shackled in the Shadows?
The Moon is full at 3:43 am GMT on 4th May in the 14th degree of Scorpio. Together with the Sun in Taurus it forms a T Square to Jupiter in Leo. This Moon casts a backward glance to July 2014 when Jupiter first entered Leo. Nine months on we are encouraged to reflect on events since then, to penetrate them with deep inner sight and identify the salient steps between there and here. This isn’t just an exercise in nostalgia, regret or self-congratulation. As the recent Yod reminded us, we cannot afford to ignore our inter-connectedness with all beings. We must make realising this connection at every level our number one priority if we are to move through the coming times in a healing and creative way. As we reflect on the past few months we can evaluate our relationship with the wider world, consider how well we have taken it into account and identify what, if anything, needs to change in that respect.
A Scorpio Full Moon is often intense with deep emotions surfacing. It opens the doors to the unconscious and bids us enter. We may immediately regret our decision when we hear them slam shut behind us, but if we stand still and wait, eventually our inner eye becomes adjusted to the darkness and shapes begin to form. No longer in pitch black we begin to perceive old thoughts, feelings and memories left to wither in the shadows. Except they haven’t. Instead, fed by darkness, they have grown bigger and more intimidating the longer their neglect. This Full Moon shines its light upon these creatures in the basement, turning their faces towards us. We may shut our eyes tight so as not see, but with the courage to look we discover only our face looking back. Younger, perhaps, as a child maybe; a face of fear or shame, unmanageable anger or irreconcilable grief. It was us all along, locking ourselves away. This Moon reveals the extent to which we have repeatedly done so and how much of what we are is cast into the shadows.
Which is where Jupiter in Leo comes in, shining bright in the sign ruled by the Sun. Jupiter aligns with this Moon because we owe it to ourselves to shine, to allow all that we are to be seen. Only in doing this can we come to know ourselves in such depth that fears do not rule us and shame cannot force us into silence. When we own our anger, despair, or nameless terror as willingly as the ‘acceptable’ bits, they integrate with all that we are, playing their part in the incredibly complex tapestry of our being, not holding it to ransom as the hostile outsider. It is rejecting what we are that gives it power, not being it. Once our grief meets face to face with our hope, our anger with our compassion, our greed with our gratitude we begin the transformation into wholeness, no longer fractured by denial and rejection. This is not about demanding the world bear the full force of our rage just because we’re angry right now. That would be Jupiter in Leo out of balance, serving the false self to keep it strong. Required now is a willingness to allow all that we are into consciousness, to live with integrity which refuses to ignore the inconvenient feelings in favour of the desirable ones. Jupiter in Leo asks of us self-respect and the courage to express our life force however it flows in the moment, not with unconscious momentum that makes us reactive and ‘trigger-happy’ but with conscious awareness that sees us authentically responsive to whatever arises.
Whilst the past few years may have seen us self-absorbed and struggling with deeply personal change, the current time is one of recognition that we can never act apart from the whole. It simply isn’t possible. When we push away our pain, frustration, grief, rage, depression, jealousy, greed or anything else we care not to own, we add it to the collective shadow in which are found all things denied, repressed and ignored. It doesn’t go away. It doesn’t even stay in our own personal unconscious. Instead it filters through into the unified energy field which connects us all. It lives there, like a virus awaiting download onto an unwitting computer, ready to shape its memory banks and behaviour to reflect its own agenda. We are those computers, uploading to and downloading from the energetic web that connects us all. Our denied frustrations contribute to the well of anger drawn upon by another who we then condemn. Our projected greed acted out by those upon whom we look with disdain. We are all of us responsible for what we contribute and what we download from this unified field of mental and emotional data. This Full Moon requires careful attention to our contribution. It asks that we reclaim our discarded selves, tossed aside for fear they may tarnish our being. Own them, embrace them, share our inner space with them so they no longer need to stand aside, growing ever more powerful in the shadows, ever more influential in the unified field of unconscious shame.
This Moon demands a lot of us and offers much in return. The more deeply we look within, the greater the resulting freedom. We simply cannot be free when we cannot be whole and we cannot be whole if all we want to be is the ‘good’ bits in ourselves, embracing life’s triumphs whilst tensing against the rest. The Moon shines her light on all of us and everything. Nothing is hidden now, unless by our own wilful blindness. For those with courage to see she offers freedom born of knowing the self inside and out, for good and for bad, in its highest and lowest aspects. In naming, owning and accepting it we help liberate ourselves and all beings from the shackles of shame and fear